Sunday, August 08, 2004

The Future of Customer Service

Operator : "Thank you for calling Pizza Hut . May I have your..."
Customer: "Hello, can I order.."
Operator : "Can I have your multi purpose card number first, Sir?"
Customer: "It's eh..., hold on......98261-020490-4489-006899"

Operator : "OK... you're... Mr Singh and you're calling from 17 Jalan Kayu. Your home number is 294 2366, your office 245 2302 and your mobile is 098261-92566. Which number are you calling from now Sir?
Customer: "Home! How did you get all my phone numbers?"

Operator : "We are connected to the system Sir"
Customer: "May I order your Seafood Pizza..."

Operator : "That's not a good idea Sir"
Customer: "How come?"

Operator : "According to your medical records, you have high blood pressure and even higher cholesterol level Sir"
Customer: "What?... What do you recommend then?"

Operator : "Try our Low Fat Hokkien Mee Pizza.You'll like it"
Customer: "How do you know for sure?"

Operator : "You borrowed a book entitled "Popular Hokkien Dishes" from the National Library last week Sir"
Customer: "OK I give up... Give me three family sized ones then, how much will that cost?

Operator : "That should be enough for your family of 10, Sir. The total is Rs 549.99
Customer: "Can I pay by credit card?"

Operator : "I'm afraid you have to pay us cash, Sir. Your credit card is over the limit and you're owing your bank Rs 2,33,720.55 since October last year"

Operator : "That's not including the late payment charges on your housing loan Sir.
Customer: "I guess I have to run to the neighbourhood ATM and withdraw Some cash before your guy arrives"

Operator : "You can't Sir. Based on the records,you've reached your daily limit on machine withdrawal today"
Customer: "Never mind just send the pizzas, I'll have the cash ready. How long is it gonna take anyway?"

Operator : "About 45 minutes Sir, but if you can't wait you can always come and collect it on your motorcycle..."
Customer: " What !"

Operator : "According to the details in system, you own a Scooter,...registration number MP-04, E1123..."
Customer: " *'!^ *%^**%^*"

Operator : "Better watch your language Sir. Remember on 15th July 1987 You were convicted of using abusive language on a policeman... ?"
Customer: [Speechless]

Operator : "Is there anything else Sir?"
Customer: "Nothing... by the way... aren't you giving me that 3 free bottles of coca cola as advertised?"
Operator : "We normally would Sir, but based on your records you're also diabetic....... "

2 comments:

Akhand said...

very good keep it up

Akhand said...

very good keep it up